BDSM Pony Part IV: D/s in Pony Play
Classic D/s (Dominant/submissive) relationships have never looked quite like the D/s of pony play. While exact definitions of Dominant and submissive are debated within the BDSM community, most will agree that the Dominant is in control of the relationship and its associated activities. The submissive or slave, surrenders to the will of the Dominant. This expression of these practices has endless possibilities and often evolves over time. However, people can generally tell who is Dominant and who is submissive based not only on the actions of the parties, but of the symbols involved. For instance, a Dominant usually wears clothes and the slave is nude. The Dominant may hold a whip and the slave may wear a collar. These little things keep order in our minds and community when it comes to role definition and prescribed interactions. The context defines the apparent role of the persons involved according to the presentation and interactions.
Pony play can also be a form of self-expression that isn't concerned with external definitions. The traditional fantasy of pony play involves a Dominant trainer and a submissive pony, or at least a pony who generally agrees to be trained by a handler of some kind. In the early days, pornographic representation of pony play nearly always depicted male Dominants and female submissive ponies. More recently, female Dominant trainers and male submissives became more common. This financially driven depiction is misleading when it comes to every day play. In practice, pony players do not fit under such neat little headings and the lines of Dominant and submissive may be blurred. Those who practice BDSM and pony play ten to be more likely to refuse external definitions and break the prescribed role definitions. Often the dynamic between the players or their personal identification remains a mystery to the casual observer, though generally it is assumed that the trainer is the Dominant and the pony is the submissive. However, other expressions of Dominance and submission commonly take place for a variety of reasons. Probably the most common reason for deviation from the expected norm is that a submissive is interested in pony play and asks his or her Dominant to participate. Often the pony has the real life experience with bio-equines and therefore the knowledge of pony play while the Dominant is inexperienced, which leaves the submissive to train the Dominant to train the submissive! Although this may feel wrong to the submissive, it still works when the partners have good communication and mutual respect. Sometimes a Dominant pony or alpha submissive pony enlists a submissive or another Dominant to be the trainer. A Dominant may want to have a pony experience or a submissive may want to learn to handle and train ponies to increase his or her skill set or just have fun.
Humans have certain characteristics of personality and temperament that are analogous to those of bio-equines. Ponies find their equine selves by looking within themselves and examining these characteristics. Bio-equines may be dominant or submissive. Horses work within a hierarchical social structure within the herd. There is always just one horse in charge, but cells work out their pecking orders. They rank themselves through asserting and relinquishing position in the herd according to their level of willingness and ability to exert power and control. In addition, bio-equines exhibit a variety of personalities which effect the expression of their dominant or submissive temperaments. If you think about how each breed has a particular set of personality traits and match that with variant grades of dominant and submissive, you can begin to see the large variety of equine personalities. These dynamics easily come out in pony play.
A pony may create a whole new self or alter ego. A person choosing to become a pony may express his or her innermost self, an aspect of self, a fantasy personality, or an opposite personality. Her or she may embrace some form of Dominant or submissive drive. Perhaps the choice expresses a form in between, which may lead to switching or multiple personalities. The same dynamics exist for trainers and handlers as well. This breadth of choice within pony play encourages creative expression of persona or personas.
Humans need some type of outlet for creativity, self-expression, and play. Why not pony play? One of my early and favorite ponies, Windy, from the San Francisco Bay Area, tells a fantastic story about how she first came to pony play. The aesthetics of the early stereotypical images along with the interest in experiencing submission, the forced bondage, and the idea of being forced to do pony things drew her to pony play. One summer day she decided to go to a pony play event, which one of her submissives would also be attending. Once there, Windy directed her submissive to put Windy in her gear, handed the reins to her submissive, and said, "Now you're the trainer." The submissive became in essence a walking hitching post, the first form of handler. This is now how Windy tells the handler who does not know pony play to begin with his or her pony.
Top or bottom, Dominant or submissive, pony play contains the possibilities of all dynamics. Dare to break the stereotypes if necessary to find your perfect expression within pony play. Many have gone before you. The likelihood is that more will follow.
